Your Blogging With Dr P... search result is below this annoucement. In April 2008 Blogging With Dr P... moved to Blog Bypass.
If you're using the Blog Studio Search Facility to find a link to a previous blog, then I've been very generous, and NOT included an automatic re-direct which would take you there.
So, what this means is you have to use this link: Blog Bypass to find more Blogging With Dr P....
Thank you to Blog Studio for all the help over years! :)
(Feb 2010 Update): Haloscan is no more. Therefore the comments on this blog are no more. Sad, but true. I'm not paying $12 a year for the occasional comment with Echo. Apologies to all those who have commented. I have saved them and may well stick them somewhere else at some point.
Saturday, April 30, 2005
Jennifer Wilbanks - What A Bitch! Oh it was such a tragic story with a happy ending - little Jen Jen had been found - she had escaped from her captors in a garage in New Mexico - and a made a call home to her distraught fiancee and family. If only it were true..... She'd got cold feet about her wedding and jumped on a bus to Vegas! I'm not shitting you here - Jennifer Wilbanks jumped on a bus to Vegas - she was NOT abducted - what a bitch! And remember this happened last Tuesday - 3 days ago. So she went to Vegas to get laid, gamble, do drugs - all of them, none of them, who cares? The whole nation had been scared for her. Her whole family, friends, wedding guests, police, community in Duluth, Georgia had spent three days searching for her - fearing the worst. And where was she? In Vegas - and finally ending up in Albuquerque, New Mexico. Her abductor - a Hispanic guy and a white woman - had cut her hair and drove around in a van for three days. And then big brave Jennifer Wilbanks ecaped at a gas station, and called her mommy collect... What a bitch! Well - it's all going to unfold now. But remember you read it here first - Jennifer Wilbanks jumped on a bus to Vegas - she was NOT abducted. I'm sure someone make a good movie out of it "The Three Days Of Jennifer". I'm sure she's emotionally disturbed etc - but three days in Vegas & New Mexico - c'mon - that surely must have been enough time to realise that what she wa doing was WRONG - and killing her fiancee and folks back home? Do you know what he did about an hour ago when the news was broke to him that she had not been kidnapped at all - he went back bed - too fucking right! That's the breaking news.......
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Friday, April 29, 2005
Large Wobbly Dangly Bits Yup. That's about the size of it. One final week on the trail around East Anglia, and I'm back home to the ranch - totally fucked. This was the last week in my present role - now a Bank Holiday weekend... and let the games begin next week in the new job. I'll put some photos and stuff up here over the weekend - I'm just going through the zillions of emails in my inbox.
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Monday, April 25, 2005
New Week - Last Week It's early Monday morning and I'm about to set off on my last week working in my present position. I shall be touring East Anglia - Great Yarmouth, Norwich, Kings Lynn and Cambridge. Ironically, this is this first, (and last), week in this 8 year job where I'll be staying away in 4 separate hotels, in 4 different towns. This means that I may not find a very handy grocery store with an internet cafe, (as I did in Paris), to drop by and say "hello". Indeed, it will be a very different week I'm sure. Look after yourselves munchkins - and I'll see y'all real soon.
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Sunday, April 24, 2005
Yes, It's Sunday Evening I feel like I should be writing a review of last week, or some sort of mission statement for the forthcoming week with a blog title like Yes, It's Sunday Evening. But I shan't be doing either of those things, it'll just be the usual old fannel. For the third weekend in a row, I have been communicating across the WWW with my brother Ged in Brisbane, Australia. You'd think it be as easy as using Yahoo Messenger, Skype, MSN Messenger, or any number of voice/webcam chat software, wouldn't you? Not so when your brother happens to own a Mac... It's not for me to say anything about Mac users, except they think that they are God's gift to computing becuase their systems NEVER bring down - EVER. Lordy, it's a pain to hear these people drone on about how secure Mac's are etc etc. They also happen to be wholly uncompatible with normal Windows PC's on many levels. In this particular instance we are talking about chat software. The only way that we seem to be to voice/webcam with one another is if he uses i-chat on his Mac, and I use AOL Messenger on my PC. It works, not all the time, (I have to turn off my firewall), and it's not brilliant. Ged did find a new piece of software called ohphonex which he has to install on his Mac and it's compatible with Netmeeting on my PC. We've yet to try it out. The reason for all this striving to perfection is because I'll be taking a PC up to my mum's, and I want it to be able to voice/webcam okay with some very easy to use software - so she can talk to my brother in Oz, and see Caitlin my lovely niece as well. So, if anyone knows of any really easy Mac-to-PC voice/webcam software - drop me a line in the comments box below - ta :)
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Saturday, April 23, 2005
Gott In Himmel - The New Pope is a Nazi! Yup. A member of the Hitler Youth in his days. And if you want to have a go at him, here's his email address: benedictxvi@vatican.va
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Friday, April 22, 2005
Now This Explains A Lot About Life, The Universe and Everything... Email destroys the mind faster than marijuana - Modern technology depletes human cognitive abilities more rapidly than drugs, according to a psychiatric study conducted at King's College, London. And the curse of 'messaging' is to blame. Email users suffered a 10 per cent drop in IQ scores, more than twice the fall recorded by marijuana users, in a clinical trial of over a thousand participants. Doziness, lethargy and an inability to focus are classic characteristics of a spliffhead, but email users exhibited these particular symptoms to a "startling" degree, according to Dr Glenn Wilson. Read on... Like.....wow, man. Another penis extension email. I mean, wow - have a bang on that dude - you won't need that shit after you've opened another 1,000 emails or so.....
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Thursday, April 21, 2005
The Virgin Mary and French Women's Deodorant It's an unlikely title for a blog entry I know. But there are two things wot am rattling inside my head today which I must get rid of. The first is this: Apparently it's the outline of the Virgin Mary as seen on the wall of a Chicago motorway underpass. Is it true? Who knows. But as the item says: In a highly publicised case last year, an old toasted cheese sandwich said to bear her, (the Virgin Mary's), image sold on the eBay auction website for $28,000. Okay, the other main thought running through my head concerned this previous blog entry about Aluminium In French Women's Deoderant Conspiracy. I made some mockery of the fact that the certain women in France who alerted me to the fact that there may be a conspiracy to poison women by promoting Alzheimers Disease in them by putting aluminium in their deoderants. Sounds ridiculous, right? However.....read on..... "The Environmental Magazine, CT, January/February 2005, Vol. XVI, no. 1 Heavy Metal? Exploring the Aluminum/Alzheimer's Link by Melissa Knopper What About Antiperspirants? Adults and teens who use antiperspirant every morning get another daily dose of aluminum. While the skin absorbs a very small percentage of the aluminum in antiperspirants, studies show, natural health advocates raise questions about the effects of constant exposure. Antiperspirants work by plugging sweat glands with aluminum salts. Plenty of herbal alternatives are on the market at health food stores. But Yokel encourages shoppers to do their homework. A check of the label on one brand of crystal deodorant stone showed "alum" in the ingredients. That, Robert Yokel, a University of Kentucky pharmacy professor who is studying aluminum for the National Institute of Environmental Health Sciences, (NIEHS), advises, is simply a natural form of aluminum. Another option is to buy conventional deodorant, which should be aluminum-free as long as it doesn't say "antiperspirant" on the label." So, the mad women of France may not be so mad after all. Of course, living in a country where there appears to be a natural repulsion to soap and water.....!.... I suspect she'll be having her deodorants shipped in from dear old Blighty! ;)
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Tuesday, April 19, 2005
Gott in Himmel It's A New Pope! A German Pope - Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger is Pope Benedict XVI. Apparently he wants to change all the railway timetables and invade Poland - what a guy! I often wondered how they created the white smoke out of the Vatican chimney - just a bunch of doped up pipe-hitting cardinals hanging loose. A German Pope - just think about it for a minute. God it'll be so annoying. Remember at every available opportunity I want to see "4 -2 1966" banners at every football match instead of the usual John 3:16 - okay? ;)
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Monday, April 18, 2005
things* Things* went okay today - more of that later... Lets talk about motorway traffic - because I can. What in God's name, (aside: Wouldn't it be funny if God was called Dave, Stevie, or even Jimmy-Ray or soemthing?), makes people get in MY way on the motorway when it's raining?! Without exception, (except if there is another pan-universal dimension glider like myself out there..!), they all slow down. If you want to s..l..o..w down - get in the kiddies' lanes - and leave the outside lane for us MEN! God - this morning the lanes were full of people aho clearly owned their own car, and were more concerned about having a smash than us company car drivers who really don't give a shit. Suffice to say the air was blue, (no - I don't do coloured font), inside my car. (I think that when I have to give it back, or they pick it up from the wreckage at the side of the road - whichever is the sooner.....they'll have to get a priest to bless the interior and banish any evil spirits in there!) Anyway - bollocks - because it''s my blog - and I can say that as well! ;)
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Saturday, April 16, 2005
And Another Thing... What have future genrations ever done for us?
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The League of Gentlemen's Apocalypse Movie Synopsis: The fictional world of Royston Vasey is facing apocalypse and the only way to avert disaster is for our nightmarish cast of characters to find a way into the real world and confront their creators. From present day Soho to the fictional film world of 17th Century Britain, the residents must overcome countless bizarre obstacles in their bid to return Royston Vasey to safety. In addition to featuring the most beloved characters from the original TV series, this darkly hilarious movie adventure also features a whole host of freakish new creations and cameo performances from famous faces such as David Warner, Bernard Hill, Victoria Wood, Emily Woof, Peter Kay and Simon Pegg. This is a very strange English comedy series turned into a movie. The trailer is here: The League of Gentlemen's Apocalypse. The UK release date is 3rd June. No date for the USA yet. Enjoy.... if you can see the funny side ;)
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Friday, April 15, 2005
For Del... Back in 2001 I was in a tent halfway up the Andes Mountains in Peru wearing all my clothing because it was several degrees below zero. In 2005, whilst watching the BBC World news on a hotel Tv in Paris last week, I saw an item about the London International Petroleum Oil Exchange. The item was about the fact that the guys in the blue, red, yerllow jackets who shout "BUY!" and "SELL!" for barrels of oil, were about to become redunant because the whole thing was about to become electronic. There in the centre of the picture in a blue jacket was this guy: Del Yup Del trekked up the Andes Mountains with me and several others - all for charity :) Good luck mate!
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Thursday, April 14, 2005
Audioblog I WILL get around to setting up Audioblog - just let me get those things* sorted out first - then you can hear my lovely dulcet tones across the www ;)
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Wednesday, April 13, 2005
Does The Jorvic Museum In York Smell Like Pot Noodle? Yes, it's been one of those days. In fact, it's been one of those weeks - two to three weeks actually - in fact let's just round it off to one month and I think we'll have go there. These things* are still in the offing..... The oil light came on in the car the other day whilst driving home. Which was nice. But totally unexpected. It's only done 8,000 miles - the car, not the light. But I suppose in realative terms the light has done the same mileage as it is attached to the car. Anyway, there it was - the oil light.... So, off I ploughed into the South Mimms Services, leaving a wake of swerving traffic behind me. I've never had an oil light come on before - what the hell did it mean? It meant the oil was low - or next to nothing. I got to the garage. Stopped. I thought i'd better buy some oil for the car. This is when the question came home to roost: "What engine oil do I buy for a turbo diesel Astra?" I'll be honest, neither me nor the handbook had any idea what to get. So off I trotted into the garage shop. There was a man with a clipboard, (always the sign of authority), checking Mars bars.... checking them for "what"? I wasn't too sure of - but he was the laddie to ask for help. Alas, my foreign language training in far eastern gibberish wasn't up-to-date with the newest nuances and expressions, so we had to do with pointing and gesturing towards a shelf of oil. There was a bottle of oil for tubo diesel cars - can't say fairer than that, right? Several pounds later and a few glug, glugs into the engine - the light turned off, and I was on my way. The lesson to be learnt here is: You could have had a cup of tea in the time it's taken to read thid blog entry :)
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Monday, April 11, 2005
Lasik Lasix Eye Surgery Update It's almost three months, (12 weeks), since my lasik lasix laser eye surgery. If you recall my lasik lasix eye surgery journal/diary has tracked my progress of my lasik lasix eye surgery recovery since the lasik lasix eye surgery operation on Jan 15th. The one remaining lasik lasix eye surgery post-op complication is one of dry eyes. The question that I keep being asked is: "Dry eyes and lasix: How long have you had dry eyes since your lasik lasix eye surgery?" or "After your monovision correction lasik lasix eye surgery, how long did the blurriness from dry eyes last for?" Well, at the moment, I still have it to a degree. My distance vision, when I'm outside walking, is fine. It's only when I go indoors, or in my car, (basically when the air is NOT blowing across my eyes to make them water), that my eye gels up - and my sight gets blurry again. After my visit on Saturday morning to the very professional people at Ultralase, in Chelmsford, Essex, England, I was given some more fluid for dry eyes, and also some Lacri-Lube, (Ocular Lubricant) to be used in the following manner: 1. Boil some water. Let it cool a little. Moisten a flannel and rest it on my lower eyelid. 2. After a while, pinch my lower eyelid together. (This will, hopefully, make the glands in my lower eyelid lubricant - moisten themselves). 3. Moisten a cotton bud with the hot water and some baby shampoo, pull my lower eyelid down, and wash across the glands of my lower eyelid. 4. Apply a drop or two of the Lacri-Lube cream. This process I need to do every night for the next 4 - 6 weeks. This should cure the constant dry eye problem. I have to say that apart from the dry eye issue, I have no other problems with the monovision corrective lasik lasix eye surgery. See y'all soon ;)
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Sunday, April 10, 2005
Aluminium In French Women's Deoderant Conspiracy I make no claims on the above statement. The women who told me this when I was in France knows who she is when she reads this (!) ;) But - the Conspiracy Theory is this - womens' deoderant in France is being laced with aluminium. This ingredient is linked with Alzheimer's Diease. This ingredient, aluminium, is NOT in French men's deoderant. So, the punchline is: French men - who make the deoderant - are slowly poisoning women & promoting Alzheimer's Diease in them..... If anyone does have any concrete evidence about this - please let me know. (From my own personal opinion I find a sad lack of deoderant's in France, and the madness of the women is purely coincidental!)
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Saturday, April 09, 2005
Okay - I Watched It... But did you notice the way there was a blacksmith just outside the church in case she lost a shoe? ;)
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Thursday, April 07, 2005
Final Paris Blog Yes, it's that time of the week when all good contintental bloggers must return home to their roosts. It's been an interesting last few days of work - meetings, playing with audit equipment, ( re-labelling mine and two other PDT kits from the UK, for future French use), - and a trip to the warehouse today to meet the peeps and talk about the audit result & queries. "But what of Paris?" I hear you ask... I have now worked out why everyone in France who eats out, dines a little later than those people from the UK. (Or conversely - you can always spot the English people in French restaurants, as they are the ones eating at 7pm). It is all about television. French TV is rubbish. French people detest it so much, that they stay out of their houses - eating - between the hours of 8pm & 11pm. For those of you who have been to France,(Lauren), you will know that the only entertaining TV viewing is CNN or BBC. To expand further - peak time viewing on any French TV channel is filled with middle-aged, balding, ex-celebrity TV presenters hosting a whole range of stomach churning visual bile juice TV. I mean there are dating programmes, discussion programmes, discussions about dating programmes, reunion programmes, break up programmes, teenage discussion programmes - all presented by middle-aged fat balding men. There is something extremely unnatural about a dirty old man interviewing a teenage girl about her love life in front of a studio audience. Oh yes - there is always a studio audience in the background. It's totally unbelievable. If you do only do one thing in your life - then come to Paris and watch French TV. Well, my time is almost done here in France. I was due to be here all next week, but things* have changed, so I may only be back later in the week. Thanks for dropping by - I hope my Letters From Paris have inspired you to get on the next Air France plane and wing you way over here ;) (These things* are to be discussed at a much later date....)
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Monday, April 04, 2005
Another Day In Paris In reverse order, ( as is the way in many award cereomnies), let me tell you about my day from the last few hours, and work backwards... Ce Soir - it has been raining chats & chiens here. Unlike last night when I arrived when the weather was warm & sunny, and the night was hot & sticky - and I hardly got any sleep. (It would have been okay to open the window, except for the noise of the Dominoes Pizza's mopeds howling away through the night... oh yes, and the freight trains trundling by on the suburban railway line just below my window - not quite as bad as Elwood Blues apartment, but regularly noisy enough). Anyway, it's wet out tonight. So I wasn't going to travel very far from the hotel. Interestingly enough, in a strange twist in eating out fate, several of the restaurants which were open last night, (Sunday), were now not open tonight. But this is France. They must fast on a Monday, or something. And I ended up walking down a long road, past the Kashmiri restautant of last night, and further into a rainstorm. The rain was getting harder. The weather got so bad, I decided to head for the first habitable looking place to eat... Remember the Woody Allen movie Broadway Danny Rose? It's basically a flash back movie where all these old comedians are sitting in a New York restaurant talking about Danny Rose. Well, this place looked exactly like that on the outside. But liked a Southend fish & chip shop on the inside with cheap looking full length wall murals of a lake view over a parapet. It also had a huge fishtank with angel fish in it as well. Altogether tasteful in a lets-hope-the-food-tastes-good kind of way! Once inside the door, dripping wet, looking like a fish out of water, (quite apt for the decor actually!), I was "bonjoured" over to a table. The manager then approached. I could tell he was the manager - everybody else seemed afraid of him, he was dressed in black, and, most importantly, he looked like a Mafia Godfather!The menu was, quite naturally, in French. Well, I'd learnt that it's not always insulting to ask for an English menu... except when it is. This was one such occasion. In a voice which was probably the last living voice on earth a lot of much more hardened axe men than me had heard, the manager boomed out - "No - it is only in French!". He then proceeded to rattle off what I should eat that evening - "You want garlic bread?!" was the first demand/question. Sure - I mean what would have happened if I'd refused?! Then he made me an offer I couldn't refuse on the main course - a three pasta cheese dish - which turend out to be quite nice after all. Ice cream & coffee later I paid the man and apologised to him for coming to his restaurant on the day of his daughter's wedding ;) Le Jour - Earlier today I got to see a few different aspects of Paris life. One of them revolves around dogs. I have written about the French obscene devotion to their canine friends before - the fact that some places allow them into restaurants, and even charge a separate tariff for each etc etc. Today I saw a hippie looking guy- who looked like a taller version of the actor Richard Dreyfuss, (Jaws), who had an outrageusly shaggy looking poodle on a lead with him. if that wasn't enough, the dog's snout was taped together with, what looked like duct tape. This, of course, was sending mixed messages out to all those social observers, (me included), who saw him... so I won't try to explain what it meant. As he passed me, there was a young French woman, (with one of those haircuts that made her look like the stowaway boy/girl on Cliff Richard's Summer Holiday movie); who was about to break into a packet of very large, and fattening(!) chips, (crisps to us in England). But, as she saw me catch her eye, she stopped. And only when she was just about past me, I heard the sound of the packet being ripped open. Now - it made me think - "Why was she concerned, (if she was concerned), that I had seen her breaking into a packet of crisps?" Is this a French thing.... a girlie thing.... a French girlie thing... or am I talking total bollocks? Not more than ten paces past the crisp munching French woman, with a splash of a poster on a window, I found myself looking at another twist of culture that was about to take Paris by storm. Marilyn Manson is playing Paris on June 14th... I expect to see the crisp eating French woman, Richard Dreyfuss & his dog, and the Mafia restaurant owner there. After all - it's Paris, right- the city of art & culture? ;)
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Sunday, April 03, 2005
La Plume De Ma Tente - I am In Paris! With the unlikely hope that I would find any kind of internet cafe whilst in Paris... I find an excellent grocery/internet cafe just two doors down from the hotel - and it stays open until 1am. Todays events have been a bit hectic. Due to traffic jams, roadworks, and me setting off a bit too late, I arrived at Heathrow airport at 2.30pm - the flight was due to go at 2.50pm! The British Airways lady queue jumped me, and then whizzed ne through Fastrack - and then I had to run like a mad thing through the airport - with my case! - and just got to the gate as it was closing. So, in need of a ventilator and a two week vacation in a Swiss health farm, I staggered onto the plane. It was then delayed for 20 minutes - that's life I suppose. I discovered a new phenomena whilst flying to France. If YOU start wheezing like a thing possessed - it can start other people off as well. And this is exactly what happened. Either through herd instinct, or group hysteria or something, an Amercian lady sitting two seats away from me started to cough and rasp a little as I battled with getting a regular supply of oxygen into my lungs. By the end of the flight I had almost fully recovered, (it's only a 45min flight), but the poor old American lady looked like she needed a bloody ambulance! Well, the Hotel Villa Eugenie is a very nice place. (I'll post photos when I get back). It has very tasteful carpets, wallpaper, bathroom etc - and BBC & CNN - can't be bad, eh? But around the corner is a great Kashmiri restaurant where I have just spent the last two hours with the manager Khan - mainly talking about French driving. He even gave me a complimentary glass of some very nice rosé wine when I came in. (In typical English fashion - all Anglophiles eat at 7pm no matter where they are in the world - so his restaurant was empty when I was in). The food was excellent as well ; Okay - that's it for now for the first of this week's Letters From Paris - stay tuned to this channel for more madcap adventures of An English Auditor Abroad ;)
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Blogshares Press Release Blogging With Dr P was the subject of much speculation when analysts at several firms were heard to be very positive about it's recent performance. It's share price rose from B$1,103.40 to B$1,644.70. Much of the hype was said to originate from riskapic ormore whose Anne Frank's Diary (artefact) was said to be involved. riskapic ormore declined to comment on the recent speculation. What is it all about, this Blogshares thing? I've no idea what they're talking about? :) Here's my public account details at Blogshares: Blogshares: Blogging With Dr P.... If anyone can figure out what all this means - drop me a line please :) Anyway - must go - got to iron some shirts etc and go and see a man about an airplane to France. I may get a chance to log on during the week, but more than likely I'll be back next weekend. A bientot mes amies :)
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Pope Dies - and that, as they say, is that. He was a good man. Many Catholics disagreed with his conservative views on many things - women priests, abortion - and the apparent in-action of The Vatican over the American priests paedophile scandals. But all-in-all he brought the message of Christ around the world, united the church as best he could, and did his best to bridge political divides where he could. So - what now for the Church of Rome? They say there is an Italian cardinal and a Nigerian cardinal who are in the running for the big white pointy hat and funny chair. Hmm. Lets see what happens after the chuff of white smoke pumps out of that old Vatican chimney...... you'd think they'd have had it cleaned after all these years - it must be a fire hazard, surely? ;)
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Saturday, April 02, 2005
Off To France - For The Last Time...Peut Etre Tomorrow I'm off to see my friends and colleagues in PC City, France. As you may recall, previous trips have been somewhat of a photographic adventure: France Feb 2004 & France March 2004. And of course the Best Blogged Photo of 2004 went to one of my Versailles pics. I'll be there for a week, staying in Paris. Back next weekend. Then out again to Versailles for a few days, and then down to Bordeaux for the rest of the week. During that time I shall be helping out with their stock audits and ensuring they are up to scratch. Sadly, it could be my last time going out there due to me Shafted By My Own Company. I have thoroughly enjoyed my work out there, and I would like to think that I've made a positive impact, and some kind of contribution to the development of PC City France. I know my French colleagues have valued my input and been grateful for my help and support. This is a far greater appreciation, and recognition, of my work over there, than I ever got from my own dept. in the UK. Still - far be it for me to be a bitter and twisted man.... lol.... I've got better things to do with my life - like my expenses for this period, as soon as I've got off here talking to you :)
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If The Pope Falls Into A Coma.... Whose going to pull the feeding tube on him? As he's not married, and Italian law maybe a little different from US law anyway, I suppose it would go to his next of kin, or the person most responsible for his soul - God? Sick joking to one side for a moment - this could become an issue. I do hope he pulls through - but it doesn't look good. I went to Rome to see the Pope, (not this one), back in 1977. Liverpool were playing Borussia Munchen Gladbach in the European Soccer Cup final that week in Rome. The place was full of scousers!. The Italians couldn't understand them - as well as us! ;)
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Friday, April 01, 2005
Today In London I had a great time today in London. I had two interviews for phenomenally great jobs with two different employment agencies. One was just off Covent Garden, the other was just around the corner on The Strand. The interviews were set up following the exciting news of Being SHafted By My Own Company a few weeks ago. One job looks very promising and will probably result in a further interview with the company concerned. T'other job will be dealt with next Monday. Also whilst in London - a Big Red Bus stopped beside me. It had an advertisement on the side of it for the London stage show production of Chitty Chitty Bang Bang. The character of The Childcatcher is being played by Alvin Stardust. And then I had a brilliant idea! Jonathan King could be the Child Catcher! ;)
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