Your Blogging With Dr P... search result is below this annoucement.
In April 2008 Blogging With Dr P... moved to Blog Bypass.
If you're using the Blog Studio Search Facility to find a link to a previous blog, then I've been very generous, and NOT included an automatic re-direct which would take you there.
So, what this means is you have to use this link: Blog Bypass to find more Blogging With Dr P....
Thank you to Blog Studio for all the help over years! :)
(Feb 2010 Update): Haloscan is no more. Therefore the comments on this blog are no more. Sad, but true. I'm not paying $12 a year for the occasional comment with Echo. Apologies to all those who have commented. I have saved them and may well stick them somewhere else at some point.
Sunday, February 29, 2004
Here's A One Which May Have Slipped You By...
An alledged event when President Bush visited the Queen of England.
He asks her:
"How do you run an efficient government? Any tips you can give me?"
And the Queen says:
"Well, the most important thing is to surround yourself with
intelligent people."
Bush frowns, and replies:
"Well, how do I know the people around me are really intelligent or
not?"
The Queen takes a little sip of tea, and says:
"Oh, that's easy. You just ask them a riddle".
Then the Queen pushes the button on her intercom and says:
"Please send Tony Blair in here, would you?"
So Tony Blair walks into the room.
"Yes, your Majesty?"
The Queen smiles at Tony and says:
"Tony, answer me this, would you? Your mother and father have a child.
It's not your brother, and it's not your sister. Who is it?"
Without hesitating, Tony Blair says: "Well, that would be me."
The Queen smiles and says:
"Very good, thank you!"
So, back at the White House, Bush is a bit puzzled. He asks to speak
with Donald Rumsfeld: "Hey Don, answer this for me, would ya? Your
mother and your father have a child. It's not your brother and it's not
your sister... who is it? Donald Rumsfeld frowns and says:
"Gee, I'm not sure... let me get back to you."
So, Donald Rumsfeld goes to all advisors, and asks everyone he can, but
no one can answer it for him.
Finally, he ends up in the men's room, and he recognizes Colin Powell's
shoes in the next toilet. So Don shouts over to him:
"Hey Colin... can you answer this for me? Your mother and father have a
child. It's not your brother and it's not your sister. Who is it?"
Colin Powel flushes, and yells back:
"Hey, that's easy... it's me!"
Donald Rumsfeld smiles and yells: "Thanks!"
So, Donald Rumsfeld goes back into the Oval Office and tells Bush:
"Hey, I finally figured out the answer to that riddle! It's Colin
Powell!"
Bush gets up, and angrily stomps over to Donald Rumsfeld. Bush yells
right in Don's face:
"No, you idiot! It's Tony Blair!"
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Saturday, February 28, 2004
Colorado Adventure Parts 1 - 4
Ladies & Gentlemen, boys & girls, for your pleasure and delight I bring to Parts 1 - 4 of the Colorado Adventure 2004. Please feel free to read, enjoy, stick comments in the guestbook if you want at the foot of each page, or jump back here and pop a comment in the commenty thing below.
As soon as my little hands can type quick enough, I shall have the rest of the pics & commentary sorted out for your amusement & pleasure.
But - it's Saturday morning - and time to go grocery shopping.
Catch y'all later :)
p.s. this is an updated posting from this morning, as I've just completed Part 3 and uploaded it :)
p.p.s. this is the second update at 19.30hrs, as I've just completed Part 4, and am now having a break - thank you :)
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Friday, February 27, 2004
Welcome Back My Friends To The Show That Never Ends...
Okay, it was a 1974 Emerson,Lake & Palmer album title, but you know what I mean. What a week, eh? What a week! It went like this......
Set off from Philadelphia last Saturday evening around 9.30pm, (after sitting on the plane for an hour due to some technical cock-up), and arrived in London around 10.15am, (delayed again - but more about US Airways later). I did have Monday as a holiday day, but it turned into a work day, as I ended up having problems on both my company laptops. (Yes, I know two laptops is a bit excessive, bit there is a good reason for this - but it's too damned long to go into at the moment!).
Tuesday saw me attempting to replicate a whole new audit system which our company is currently rolling out as aprt of a new stock/sales system accross the country. I was attempting to replicate the new system using an Excel Macro. For those who know about macros - and I don't - they can be a right pain in the arse if they don't work. Thankfully, this one did work, but very slowly. However, it is very difficult to sound convincing when it takes about 45 mins for the macro to work - and everyone is just sat around staring at the laptop waiting for it to "do it's thing". After 1.5 days of fun and games there, I then drove down to.....
Poole - it's a lot further then you think! I live here in Grays - sorry about the crap link, it's not a very interesting place...lol...:). And I was working in Enfield on Tuesday when I drove down to Poole....and it's a lot further than you think!
Anyway, I did another one of those macro audits down there yesterday and today - and I drove back from Poole as well. Guess what? "It's a lot further than you think!"
So, to cut a long story dramatically short - I still haven't had an opportunity to go through my hundreds of photos and attach the apporpriate text to them. The Colorado Adventure 2004 will appear soon. I shall try to get this done a.s.a.p. Apologies as well for not coming to visit ya'll, as the old jet lag sleep thingy is still plaguing me a little after driving hundreds of miles around the country this week.
Remember - use this phrase whenever you can: "It's a lot further than you think" :)
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Monday, February 23, 2004
Mexican Cowboy
Here's a little taster of things to come...
It's jet lag time now, and I have to get up early for work tomorrow. I'll probably be back in this part of the world by the end of the week, and hopefully I'll get the Coloradan Adventure sorted over by the weekend.
Ugh. It's cold here isn't it? It was like summer around Denver last week!
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Friday, February 20, 2004
Colorado 2004 Part Two - The Beginning
"Ice Racism"
And here we are 38Kft above Donegal on a Saturday afternoon. Down below, after racing donkeys on the beach & charging American tourists extortionate amounts of euros to take a trip in his "jaunting car" to the actual place where "The Quiet Man" was filmed (...ahem...), Seamus O'Flynn is quietly supping on a large pint of cold Guiness in his local hostelry.
Seamus is drinking a whole measured pint. No ice. As he steps out into the beer garden, (the back field), his head tilts up slightly & he drains his glass. Through the irregular shaped bevellled base of the glass drinking pot he can see a vapour trail of an airliner crawling quietly across the upper stratosphere. There is no noise. There is never any noise in the Western part of Ireland except the complaint of an American tourist to the hotel receptionist that his kids can't get MTV in their room.
Seamus lowers his glass, squints up into the sky through the hazy winter afternoon, and smiles to himself. He remembers the one time he went on a plane. It was a short flight from Cork to Dublin to see Donegal play at Croke Park, Dublin, in the the All Ireland Hurling Final. He doesn't remember who won, as he never got to the game. He met some friends at a local bar, and the rest, as they say... is history :) Licking his lips, he swivels on one foot, turns, and wanders causally back into the pub for another pint.
Up at 38Kft the drinks are less measured. There is no high school drop out with a soda gun here, (as you'd find in your average fast food outlet). There are a team of highly trained air stewards & stewardesses. The drinks are flowing. The soft drinks are free. Alcohol is five bucks a shot whatever you're having.
The soft drinks are free, in a can, and therefore, everyone gets the same measure. However, I have observed "ice racism" going on. Who would have believed it?
I remember reading that one of the great cultural differences between English & American folks is that an English person will go into a "McCafe", or some fast food place/bar & ask for a soda with no ice. This, of course, is totally unacceptable for the soda gun toting high school drop out who has been rigorously taught to fill the cup to the brim with ice - and thus only getting about a quarter of the cup filled with soda.
At 38Kft, on US99 flight, the US Airways airliner is serving drinks. We are seated in 11A & B - a few seats back from 5A :). In the 4 or 5 rows of seats the steward has served with drinks, I have noticed his casual use of "ice racism". All Americans got asked whether they wanted ice or not, and all the English/Non American people got a cup full of ice. So, what can one conclude from this?: (From a pro-American point of view):
1. The ice is made from local UK tap water, (presumably), and therefore is very hard & not all pleasant to drink - so the less ice the better.
2. the drink won't be diluted as much & therefore taste better.
3. "Isn't it nice of the stewadrs to ask?" - for those Americans who thought all stewards were from the high school drop out soda gun school of bartending.
On the other hand, from a positive English/Non-American point of view one might think:
1. "All that ice! That will keep my drink cooler for longer"
2. "All that ice.... etc and at least I won't have the embarassment of having to ask for another one." (Because we English are quite reserved at that kind of thing).
3. "Isn't it nice for the steward to ask?" - for all those English/Non-Americans who thought that all Americans are brash & bone-headed, and who think that etiquette is a kind of French chocolate.
In conclusion, I can definately say - "Yes - "ice racism" exists" on US Airways. Although I've yet to understand in whose favour it manifests itself towards.
378 Miles From Philadelphia
Philadelphia. Apparently it's a Dutch word for "woven cheese cardigan, (as worn by the original settlers).
At 39Kft, 378 miles from Philly puts you somewhere over Portland, Maine. Portland is named after "Simple John Portland" an English explorer who had traversed the North West Passage & founded a coastal town named after himself - in Oregan. On his return with a boat load of cheese sweater wearing Dutch settlers - in Maine - the town was "...not there..." - so they built another one & named it after him. He is the only English explorer to have this honour accredited to him.
Just to keep y'all informed - I'm still at Dave's Desk in Colorado. we shall be back in the old UK sometime on Sunday. I still can't read any comments posted below - so thank you for all the "nice stuff" :)
I shall be working away from home almost straight away when I get back, so I shall not be updating here with the full adventures of this trip until the end of next week, As there is a mountain of photos and things to write about (!), I shall probably add in a few additional web pages and just link to them from here.
I hope everyone, everywhere is okay, and I hope to speak to y'all soon. Have fun.
Paul
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Monday, February 16, 2004
Colorado 2004 Part One
No - I'm not back yet - I'm A Mile High... nope, I'm not on drugs, I'm seating at Dave's Desk in Broomfield, Colorado USA. The local time is 10.30am - but my internal clock clock tells me it's 5.30pm. This makes the mornings relatively okay, but the afternoons are a bit like zombie time.... no disrespect for any zombies reading this. (Can zombies read? Anyway.....)
Anyway, I 've not had an opportunity to read any of y'all comments on anything below, because I can't seem to open them - ha. So, I'll assume that everyone is okay, and that you're just saying 'hello' :)
Colorado is...BIG - I mean bloody huge! To put it in some kind of perspective - in the time it takes to drive the length of England, you'd probably just get from one side of the state to the other. That's big in anyone's book. It is also a mile high, hence the s...l...o...w typing :).
Yes, there are cowboys in Colorado. But that's enough about the local politicians :). The people here are very nice. Gloria & Dave, (Sue's aunt & uncle), we are staying with, are very nice, and they have a lovely home here in sunny Brooomfield. And believe me - it is sunny! I'm glad I brought my sunglasses with me. And the air is very dry as well - this is a great place for a an Avon Lady to make a killing.
I shall be posting oodles of photos when I get back - have you ever seen a Mexican cowboy in a white hat, yellow shirt, and yellow crocodile skin boots? No? You soon will :)
Anyway kiddies, must dash, we're about to go home, home on the range - actually I think we're going to Walmart - the modern day equivalent :)
Catch y'all later :)
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Friday, February 13, 2004
Afghanistan Banana Stand
There are many things which could be misconstrued for something else. But a McDonalds is a McDonalds, right? I don't know what is going on in the USA with MackyDees restaurants, but over here in little old Europe they've had a bit of a re-launch. Take a look at one I snapped in Terminal 2B at Paris, Charles De Gaulle Airport the other week:
It's a McCafe. Oh....how....clever. The menu is more-or-less the same. The service is with the same disdain for human life. And the seating areas have gotten smaller to make them appear more trendy. Ho hum. Whatever next? Members only?
Anyway, onto more news - I'm absolutely knackered - and I'm not ashamed to say so. After the rigorous French trip, and a few hectic days, (I mean hectic days!), at work. I could do with a holiday. Thankfully, Sue & I had already booked a week off for next week :). Soooooo, we're off to Colorado for a week to visit some aunts & uncles and friends of Sue out there. Should be a larf.
Which means I won't be around for a good 7 - 10 days again. However, I shall be abck with a humongous amount of American Photos and stories for y'all to enjoy :)
Be good while I'm away - and don't go 'reading' any strange(r) people while I'm gone! :)
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Thursday, February 12, 2004
Seat 5A
Have you ever wondered what it's like to seat in the seats directly behind First Class?. I mean in the seats where the curtains get drawn across? Well, wonder no more. Welcome to Seat 5A...
Yes, it's a marvellous place to sit. The three seats are squashed into two, or at least they would have to fill the middle seat up with someone flying to an Anorexic Convention if they did want to fill it. And the view is better, no wing to get in the way...
- okay, there's an engine if you point the camera down. But it does show a nice backwards reflection of British Airways :). But if you point the camera straight to the side, you can get some glorious sunsets up there...
Naturally, the "inflight service" is superb....
Or at least she was superb. I tend to find that normal people have a habit of shying away from a camera lense, which is why I have to do these pics rather sneakily. And that includes this next one of my unknown flying companion in Seat 5C...
I beleive the book he was reading was called A Star Called Henry by Roddy Doyle. He was obviously a well educated chap, but with just not enough money to be sitting on the other side of the curtain :)
Still, I liked 5A - I might ask for it again next time :)
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Tuesday, February 10, 2004
France Feb 2004
I felt I owed it to the great taxi drivers of France (!), to give them a mention here. Lets be honest, without them we would never get to our hotels from the airport, get around the great cities & towns of France. So, in keeping in tradition with all things French, here are Chinese, Arabic, and African taxi drivers "in action" :
 
There was another piccie of another French Chinese taxi driver,
but lets face it - once you've seen one picture of a French Chinese taxi driver - you've seen them all, right? ;)
Outward At Gatwick
So, what do "real people" do at airports :
I call this photo Dyke & Cup. Basically, there were 5ive shaven headed, boiler suited "wimmin" who were slumped across several seats celebrating something?(probably their escape from a maximum security prison!). Anyway, the leader decided to slam her boot down on the chair in front of her in a defiant "Well if a MAN can do it - so can I" type action. Sadly, what she thought she was achieving for the rights of wimmin was not how it looked - it looked like a shaven headed, boiler suited old dyke slamming her "workpersons" boot on the chair - quite odd and unattractively scarey.
In complete contrast, in the row of seats in front of them, was a real man...
Man & Machine in perfect harmony,eh ? Unlike this strange Media Mix...
- of laptops, headphones, newspapers - oh yes - and some guy with a digital camera...;)
A Lady In Distress
It was whilst waiting in the departure lounge at Gatwick that I was approached by a slightly nervous, seemingly distressed lady. She asked if I was French, and then, (even when I said I was English, but spke a little French), she sat down beside me and proceeded to tell me why she was at the airport and what she was intending on doing.
The lady, (whose identity shall remain secret), we'll call Sarah. Well, poor Sarah was on the edge, she was on a mission of the heart. Her and her French boyfriend had had an enormous row on Friday, (this was Sunday as I was flying out), and he upped & left - and flew back to French. It sounded a bit extreme to me, but there was slightly more to it than meets the eye.
If I can give a bit of background here without breaking any confidentialities, it is this - Sarah had said something about her boyfriend's family - and this may have been the last straw for him. Poor Sarah was in a right old state. She was also concerned that she may not "win" her boyfriend back if he found out how old she really was. Yes - she lied about her age to her boyfriend. Although I did feel sorry for her, I was amazed that she had lead her boyfriend on to believe that she was 10 years younger than she actually was.
But there were a few more technical issues to overcome for Sarah. She was going to Paris - without an address. Yup. Sarah knew the district where the boyfriend would be staying in, and knew what the house looked like - but didn't have the address. (And just to answer the more obvious questions : no, the boyfriend's mobile phone was switched off, and no - the house phone wasn't being answered either). So, things were going to be a bit difficult when she got there.
But getting there proved to be a bit of a slow starter as well. Sarah had only decided ro rush to Paris on that Sunday morning. The ticket cost a fortune. And then there she was in the departure lounge not knowing what to do. My basic "Survival Planning in Crisis Situations" told me that the only way to find out what the boyfriend wants was to go and get him... but with some planning as well. So, I said to Sarah that she should get on the plane, and I'd help her get a map & sort a taxi out at the airport. So, off we went to Paris one cold Sunday lunchtime in February...
The flight was fairly uneventful apart from Sarah going completely to pieces at times - and knocking back a few drinks for Dutch Courage. At this point the poor girl, (who was actually two years older than I was), became very insecure. She wasn't a happy bunny. So I sat there & listened to all her problems, cares & woes, and figured that I couldn't really not help her. I mean, anything could have happened to her in France. (She spoke some French, but was not in a fit state to think clearly). Forty five minutes later, we touched down at Paris.
After a few brief conversations with a newsagent, Sarah purchased a map. She was getting more nervous. I suggested that her plan of attack should be :
?If she found the house, but no-one was there - go back into the town & find a hotel.
?If she couldn?t find the house - go back into the town a find a hotel.
?If she found the house, found the boyfriend, but he turned out to be a pig - go back into the town & find a hotel.
It was 3pm when I put Sarah into a taxi. She was crying & nervous. I gave her my mobile phone number so she could phone me later on & let me know that she was safe.
So, after I dragged my ass across Paris, onto a train, and was just about to get off at Lille - my phone rang. It was Sarah. She had found the house. The boyfriend was there. He had been out drinking the night before & was sobering up. Sarah said that it probably wasn't a good idea that she had come. She didn't sound happy. She said that she would phone me the next day to let me know how she got on - but I never heard from her again.
Is Sarah okay? Probably. She had plenty of phone numbers & was constantly phoning her two friends in the UK - they were the only people knew that she was in France - she didn?t even tell her mum, who did phone Sarah whilst we were sitting in Gatwick Airport on our way out. Her return ticket would have brought her back six days later. I'm sure she'll be back in the UK - boyfriendless. But, to be honest, it will probably do her good to get herself straight in her own head before she goes chasing across Europe again after a man.
Christophe's Angels
Yes ? remember those guys ? Well, they were back in Lille doing what they do best - protecting stock and defending boxes wherever they may turn up in PC City Leers...
I liked Lille. On the way back to Paris I decided to take a few sneaky piccies using the swivel lens on the Nikon 2500. Here?s showing you the TGV - Trans Grande Vitesse at it's fastest between Lille & Paris...
And for those of you who remember last years excursions to France, you'll remember me talking about the mirrored overhead baggage rack on the TGV. Well, "when in Rome"....take a piccie ! :
And the funniest thing was that after "playing" with both my mobile phone and my digital camera for most of the train journey, the rather "posh" looking lady sitting next to me, got out her mobile phone and started to text somebody! Naturally, when one has ones swivel lens digital camera with one, one cannot resist the temptation to take a sneaky piccie of one?s neighbour...
After about an hour I arrived here :
- the city of "Precision Signs & Lamposts".
It was an "interesting" taxi ride. We stopped at some lights & I saw...
The Pink Door. If you look carefully she has opened the door slightly and is holding various "business type" things like a clipboard etc. As we pulled away from the lights the lady was on her mobile phone, slightly opening the door a birt further, then looking up the outsdie of the building and seemed to be saying : "Well, this is the address - but it sure doesn't look like the place!".
But the next quick snap revealed more than I thought I was going to get. It's a bloke getting on his bike, right?...
Wrong. Look again. See the proud French grandparents with the grandaughter. Notice how the grandmother still walks like she owns the sidewalk, and the grandfather seems a bit more realxed in his old age, (probably having fought for the freedom of his country in the last World War). And then there's the little girl who is carefully picking her steps, in a world of her own, swinging safely between grandma's & grandpa's tight grip... Oh yes - there's a bloke with a moped as well :).
And if you're ever on the Boulevard Morland & you're wondering where to park, or where The Bastille is, take this picture with you :
Creteil
After Lille, and that short trip through Paris, the taxi finally arrived at my hotel in Creteil :
If you recall last years description of the hotel, as the venue for the Armenian Boxing Convention, all that my poor sick colleague Stephan, ( who is not with me on this trip - but I've told he has to be better for the November trips!), could say when I emailed him the photographs of the hotel this time, was : "Wow ! It must have been a hell of a fight this time!"...
And just to prove that I do actually do some work on these trips & not just sit around taking strange photos all the time(!)...
But all good things must come to an end, and I found myself back at Paris Charles De Gaulle airport. Isn't it funny the natural way we stand & think?...
They were Russian. And she...
...was "rushing" down the stairs behind me. I heard her on her mobile phone on the stairs behind me. But as I whipped the swivel lens around & snapped the picture, she had turned to move off.
So, how's about that for a one week trip to France, eh? I still have a few more piccies to post here, but that's quite a lot to take in isn't it? It took me bloody long enought to prepare... lol. Thanks for dropping by :)
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Guest Blogger - From the USA
My good friend Mr Paul Wittemann - an American chappie whom I've known for many years, sent mr this in an email whilst I was away......
Hey Paul,
I had an idea for your Blog page after watching tonights Grammy awards show. Maybe you could post it for me, and to avoid criticism against yourself, let your audience know it came from your weird American friend. Here goes:
I watched the grammies tonight and I cannot believe how shitty the music is nowadays. Let's face it....Outkast SUCKS, Justin Timberlake CAN'T SING, Christina Aguilera can't even write her owns songs and looks like the lead singer to Twisted Sister, Britney Spears is a mama's girl and I could give a damn about who she marries and divorces the next day, Prince, Madonna and Carlos Santana are musically dead (I never liked the last two anyway), overall, our youth's music is no longer rebellious and exciting like it used to be - it's a big National Enquirer / Extra / Access Hollywood story about who is dating who, etc. Where are the good old days of bands making their own music, selling out stadiums with kids in the parking lot drinking and partying before the show, wrecking hotel rooms, and biting off bats heads? I miss the good old days. I feel like I MUST be getting old, because I cannot relate to today's music. I mean, I like Rap, because it is catchy and rebellious, but where are the musicians? I WILL NOT BE FORCED TO BUY A JESSICA SIMPSON ALBUM! NOR WILL I BE FORCED TO BUY A HILLARY DUFF ALBUM! These are MANUFACTURED musicians, molded by record companies and celebrity gossip shows, with no real musical talent. I am so tired of this crappy "catchy" music that I want to vomit! Where are the bands like Led Zeppelin, Lynryd Skynyrd, Queen, the old Aerosmith, the old Metallica, Journey, Pink Floyd, Bob Segar, The Who, The Rolling Stones, Foreigner, The Beatles, Eric Clapton, Def Leppard, even Guns and Roses and Rage Against the Machine? Why are we listening to Beyonce? What is happening to our youth? They are being saturated with NICE singers with NICE songs. And I don't care about Janet Jackson's breast.....it's fake, anyway! I LIKE THAT OLD TIME ROCK AND ROLL! Can I get an Alleluia?
Paul - BORN IN THE USA
.....so - what about that? :)
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Sunday, February 08, 2004
(mobile phone blog) Just me & mad french bread tearing woman in the hotel! Lol : )
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Friday, February 06, 2004
Just A Little Note...
...to say hi. I got back from France a few hours ago. I have Saturday off, and back out on Sunday again for a couple of days. Thank you all for your kind words and stuff :) ( I'd also like to say hi to the Desert Viking who shamelessly stole this little item on alcohol warnings...lol....well done!)
I do have a strange array of photos to share with you, when I get time to stick them altogether, when I'm not so tired. They include a Tribute To French Taxi Drivers....lol...:)
I'll say no more for now.
See y'all some time next week when I'm a bit more coherent :)
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Sunday, February 01, 2004
A Bee Anne Toe
I'd just like to thank Mailwasher in advance for crashing under the weight of junk email whilst I'm away :)
Caoi caoi, woof, woof!
Laters dudes :)
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